First Base Coach Fired for Constantly Wandering Off to Second, Third Base

The New York Mets shook up their coaching staff following their disappointing season, including firing first base coach Luis Alicea. The Mets claim that Alicea was fired because the team was unable to score enough runs, despite having a good on base percentage and batting average. But those behind the scenes say that Alicea was fired because he was constantly leaving his post at first base and wandering off to second or third.

"What's the big deal?" asked Alicea. "It gets boring standing at first base all of the time. Guys are constantly trying to run away from you. It gets depressing. So I just wanted to see things from a different perspective. So what."

Mets GM, Omar Minaya, was not impressed with Alicea's behavior. He said the move had to be made.

"We need our first base coach to help us produce runs. We can't have him walking across the mound or to second base while the game is going on. It's not safe for him, or the players on the field. Besides, I had to blame someone for our awful season. I'm sure not going to fire myself."