Despite being sacked a league high 20 times and taking plenty of other hits, Aaron Rodgers is refusing to criticize his offensive line. At least until he can remove himself from this huge pile of defensive players.
Showing posts with label Minnesota Vikings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Minnesota Vikings. Show all posts
Aaron Rodgers Won't Criticize His O-Line While Beneath This Pile of Defenders
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Despite being sacked a league high 20 times and taking plenty of other hits, Aaron Rodgers is refusing to criticize his offensive line. At least until he can remove himself from this huge pile of defensive players.
Brett Favre Denies Revenge Factor, Ever Playing for the Packers
Friday, October 2, 2009
"I'll admit I played for the Jets before I got here," said Favre, "but the Packers? I don't think so. I mostly played pick-up games for Wrangler commercials. I have not ever played for the Green Bay Packers."
Despite the Brett Favre Steakhouse and a street named Brett Favre Pass, he remained steady in his denial of any past association with the Green Bay Packers.
"It's just a coincidence that those things are in Green Bay. I think Favre is like 'Smith' or 'Jones' in northeast Wisconsin. There's probably a hundred guys named Brett Favre there."
Cleveland Browns: "We Erred by Not Tackling Adrian Peterson"
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Earlier this week, a former Cleveland Browns staffer said that the team erred by not drafting Adrian Peterson. Today, head coach Eric Mangini said that his defense erred in not tackling Peterson, during the Vikings 34-20 victory. A game in which Peterson ran for 180 yards and 3 TDs.
"In hindsight, we should have done a better job of tackling him," said Mangini. "I had hoped to confuse the Vikings by not tackling him, since that is what every other defense tries to do. Apparently that didn't work."
Mangini did succeed in messing up gameplanning by not naming a starting quarterback, Brady Quinn, until early this week. Unfortunately, it was the Cleveland offense, and not the Minnesota defense that suffered.
"Yeah, that one backfired too," said Mangini. "I guess next week, I'll have to wait until Friday to name a starting quarterback instead of doing it on Monday or Tuesday. The Denver Broncos are in for a world of hurt."
"In hindsight, we should have done a better job of tackling him," said Mangini. "I had hoped to confuse the Vikings by not tackling him, since that is what every other defense tries to do. Apparently that didn't work."
Mangini did succeed in messing up gameplanning by not naming a starting quarterback, Brady Quinn, until early this week. Unfortunately, it was the Cleveland offense, and not the Minnesota defense that suffered.
"Yeah, that one backfired too," said Mangini. "I guess next week, I'll have to wait until Friday to name a starting quarterback instead of doing it on Monday or Tuesday. The Denver Broncos are in for a world of hurt."
Brad Childress: "Starters to Sit Final Preseason Game, All of Regular Season"
Thursday, September 3, 2009
The Minnesota Vikings and head coach Brad Childress have announced that Brett Favre and other starters will not play in the final preseason game versus the Dallas Cowboys. They will also sit their starters for the entire regular season.
"Football is a tough game, and injuries are always a risk," said Childress. "By resting our starters for this game, and all 16 games of the regular season, our starters should be fresh come playoff time. They may be watching from their couches at home, but they'll be fresh."
"Football is a tough game, and injuries are always a risk," said Childress. "By resting our starters for this game, and all 16 games of the regular season, our starters should be fresh come playoff time. They may be watching from their couches at home, but they'll be fresh."
Vikings Cause Penicillin Shortage Due to Team Wide Schism Outbreak
Friday, August 28, 2009
Yesterday's reports indicated that the Favre situation was causing a schism in the Vikings locker room. Apparently a schism is also a disease, which caused a penicillin shortage in the Twin Cities.
"This isn't good," said a health center worker. "I've never seen a schism outbreak this bad. I've read about it occurring during the Civil War days, but I've never seen it. We just weren't anticipating this in 2009."
If this schism outbreak isn't contained, experts say that it will rival the swine flu, the bird flu, the west nile virus and SARS all wrapped into one.
"This isn't good," said a health center worker. "I've never seen a schism outbreak this bad. I've read about it occurring during the Civil War days, but I've never seen it. We just weren't anticipating this in 2009."
If this schism outbreak isn't contained, experts say that it will rival the swine flu, the bird flu, the west nile virus and SARS all wrapped into one.
John David Booty Wondering Why No One Thinks He Should Start
Thursday, August 27, 2009
The Brett Favre situation with the Minnesota Vikings has certainly been the dominating story with the team recently. However, reports have surfaced that not everyone in the locker room supports Favre. Some players think Jackson gives the team the best chance to win, while others support Sage Rosenfels. John David Booty wonders why no one thinks he should start.
"How about some love for me?" said Booty. "So what if I've never thrown a regular season NFL pass. All this talk about Favre, Jackson and Rosenfels has been really hard on me. You'd think one guy in this locker room besides me thinks I could help us win. So what if I gave up my uniform number for Favre. My mom thinks I can do a good job, so why not my teammates?"
Don't worry John David. We're pretty sure the quarterback circus in Minnesota will be around for this year and probably next year too.
"How about some love for me?" said Booty. "So what if I've never thrown a regular season NFL pass. All this talk about Favre, Jackson and Rosenfels has been really hard on me. You'd think one guy in this locker room besides me thinks I could help us win. So what if I gave up my uniform number for Favre. My mom thinks I can do a good job, so why not my teammates?"
Don't worry John David. We're pretty sure the quarterback circus in Minnesota will be around for this year and probably next year too.
Favre Throws 3 INTs During Physical
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
WCCO, the CBS affiliate in Minneapolis, is reporting that Brett Favre would sign with the Vikings if he passed his physical. We have learned that he failed the physical by throwing 3 interceptions, otherwise known as Gunslinger's Disease.
"It's disappointing," said Favre. "I really wanted to come back and play now that training camp is over. I guess I'll just have to regroup and try this charade again next year."
Head coach Brad Childress echoed Favre's feelings.
"I really would have liked Brett to be on our football team. It just didn't work out this year. But mark my word, we will pursue Brett Favre to the ends of the earth...or at least to the Mississippi high school where he works out."
"It's disappointing," said Favre. "I really wanted to come back and play now that training camp is over. I guess I'll just have to regroup and try this charade again next year."
Head coach Brad Childress echoed Favre's feelings.
"I really would have liked Brett to be on our football team. It just didn't work out this year. But mark my word, we will pursue Brett Favre to the ends of the earth...or at least to the Mississippi high school where he works out."
Minnesota Vikings QB Scenarios
Monday, August 17, 2009
It is yet to be determined who will be the starting QB for the Minnesota Vikings. The current battle is between Sage Rosenfels and Tarvaris Jackson. Apparently, Brett Favre isn't totally out of the picture either.
(Minnesota Sports Zone) -- (Fanhouse) -- (Pacifist Viking)
We've looked into the Real Fake Sports crystal ball for help predicting what may happen at QB for the Vikings this year.
Scenario #1: Sagaris Jacksenfels A is named the starter, but struggles through the first 3 games of the year. Sagaris Jacksenfels B takes over in week 4 through week 9, only to be replaced by Sagaris Jacksenfels A. Sagaris Jacksenfels B takes over again in week 13, following Sagaris Jacksenfels A's injury.
Scenario #2: Sagaris Jacksenfels is finally able to start all 16 games. He leads the Vikings to a sparkling 14-2 record, wins the NFL MVP (his first of 4), and ignites his Hall of Fame career.
Scenario #3: Without a top notch QB, coach Brad Childress elects to snap the ball directly to Adrian Peterson. When told he only has 10 players on the field, Childress will respond, "The quarterback is not much of a blocker. He may as well just stay out of the way."
Scenario #4: Brett Favre returns, is named the starting QB, and the Vikings jump out to a 7-0 record. During a tight battle with the Green Bay Packers on November 1st, the Vikings have the ball, but trail 24-20 with 2:00 left. Favre begins one of his patented two minute drills, but decides mid-play that he doesn't want to play football anymore. He walks off the field to one of his favorite Green Bay hangouts to enjoy one of Wisconsin's finest microbrews. The Vikings go on to lose the game, plus 7 of their last 8 to finish 8-8 and miss the playoffs.
(Minnesota Sports Zone) -- (Fanhouse) -- (Pacifist Viking)
We've looked into the Real Fake Sports crystal ball for help predicting what may happen at QB for the Vikings this year.
Scenario #1: Sagaris Jacksenfels A is named the starter, but struggles through the first 3 games of the year. Sagaris Jacksenfels B takes over in week 4 through week 9, only to be replaced by Sagaris Jacksenfels A. Sagaris Jacksenfels B takes over again in week 13, following Sagaris Jacksenfels A's injury.
Scenario #2: Sagaris Jacksenfels is finally able to start all 16 games. He leads the Vikings to a sparkling 14-2 record, wins the NFL MVP (his first of 4), and ignites his Hall of Fame career.
Scenario #3: Without a top notch QB, coach Brad Childress elects to snap the ball directly to Adrian Peterson. When told he only has 10 players on the field, Childress will respond, "The quarterback is not much of a blocker. He may as well just stay out of the way."
Scenario #4: Brett Favre returns, is named the starting QB, and the Vikings jump out to a 7-0 record. During a tight battle with the Green Bay Packers on November 1st, the Vikings have the ball, but trail 24-20 with 2:00 left. Favre begins one of his patented two minute drills, but decides mid-play that he doesn't want to play football anymore. He walks off the field to one of his favorite Green Bay hangouts to enjoy one of Wisconsin's finest microbrews. The Vikings go on to lose the game, plus 7 of their last 8 to finish 8-8 and miss the playoffs.
Favre Saga Over, Causing ESPN to Lay Off 25% of its Employees
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
America rejoice! The Brett Favre saga is now over. At least until September or maybe October. But along with this great news, comes some bad. Due to losing one of the major stories they've been covering, ESPN has been forced to lay off 25% of its employees.
"It's a sad day," says ABC Sports and ESPN president George W. Bodenheimer. "We really didn't want it to come to this, but with today's economy and limited stories to report, the Worldwide Leader had to make some cuts. There is no bright side for those employees that have lost their jobs. For the American sports fan, however, they have much to look forward to. Without the Favre story, we are proud to announce that we will now be devoting even more coverage to the Red Sox, the Yankees, the Cubs, Michael Vick, Lebron James and Plaxico Burress."
"It's a sad day," says ABC Sports and ESPN president George W. Bodenheimer. "We really didn't want it to come to this, but with today's economy and limited stories to report, the Worldwide Leader had to make some cuts. There is no bright side for those employees that have lost their jobs. For the American sports fan, however, they have much to look forward to. Without the Favre story, we are proud to announce that we will now be devoting even more coverage to the Red Sox, the Yankees, the Cubs, Michael Vick, Lebron James and Plaxico Burress."
Brett Favre Conflicted: "Am I a D-Bag or an Ass Clown?"
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Reports have surfaced that Brett Favre is conflicted over signing with the Vikings or remaining retired. That is not the only thing Favre is conflicted with. He wants to know, is he more of a d-bag, or an ass clown?
"I know it's been a little ridiculous lately, will I sign, won't I sign?" said Favre, in between takes of his Sears commercial. "But if I'm going to come back, I need to know, am I a d-bag or an ass clown? I just need a little time to think about things."
We tried to ask on Viking fan what his thoughts were on Favre, but unfortunately, this was his reaction.
"I know it's been a little ridiculous lately, will I sign, won't I sign?" said Favre, in between takes of his Sears commercial. "But if I'm going to come back, I need to know, am I a d-bag or an ass clown? I just need a little time to think about things."
We tried to ask on Viking fan what his thoughts were on Favre, but unfortunately, this was his reaction.
Favre and Vikings Hook Up; Walk of Shame Next
Friday, July 17, 2009
Several sources are reporting that the Minnesota Vikings and Brett Favre have hooked up.
Sports on a Stick: Vikings Totally Hooked up with Brett Favre in His Basement Last Weekend
Sports on a Stick: Vikings Totally Hooked up with Brett Favre in His Basement Last Weekend
Vikings Athletic Trainer Sent to Mississippi to Help Favre Move Some Furniture
Saturday, July 11, 2009
One of the Vikings athletic trainers, Eric Sugarman, has made yet another trip to Hattiesburg, Mississippi to help Brett Favre. But this time he wasn't evaluating his shoulder. Sugarman was sent to help Favre move some furniture.
"Some of this stuff is a little too heavy for Deanna to carry," said Favre about his wife, "so it's nice that Eric is available to come down to Mississippi. I'm sure he's glad to help out."
"Glad to help out? This is ridiculous!" said a frustrated Sugarman, "Believe it or not, we actually have players under contract that need injuries assessed, treated and rehabilitated." Future trips to Mississippi for the Viking athletic trainer will most likely include mowing Favre's lawn, landscaping his backyard, staining his deck and fixing his old pick-up truck.
"Some of this stuff is a little too heavy for Deanna to carry," said Favre about his wife, "so it's nice that Eric is available to come down to Mississippi. I'm sure he's glad to help out."
"Glad to help out? This is ridiculous!" said a frustrated Sugarman, "Believe it or not, we actually have players under contract that need injuries assessed, treated and rehabilitated." Future trips to Mississippi for the Viking athletic trainer will most likely include mowing Favre's lawn, landscaping his backyard, staining his deck and fixing his old pick-up truck.
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