Jeter Ties Gehrig, Is Unfortunately Stricken with Derek Jeter's Disease

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Derek Jeter
Originally uploaded by danny wild
Tonight, Derek Jeter has tied Lou Gehrig as the all-time hits leader for the Yankees. But the moment was a somber one for Jeter, as he was quickly diagnosed with Derek Jeter's Disease.

"I really hoped this would be a happier time," said Jeter. "Becoming the all-time hits leader for the Yankees is great. It's just unfortunate that I have to fight this terrible disease. I'm not sure what it is, or what it will do to me, but I'm going to fight it."

We have yet to get a concise explanation as to what Derek Jeter's Disease actually is. But it is believed to be caused by winning several World Series titles while dating an ill-fated string of models and actresses. All while making nearly $20 million a year. But that is merely speculation at this point.


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