Timberwolves Moving to Spain in Order to Get Rubio

Ricky Rubio
Originally uploaded by anen87

In a shocking move, the Minnesota Timberwolves have announced that they are moving to Spain in a last ditch attempt to acquire Ricky Rubio. This news comes on the heels of reports that Rubio has already signed with Real Barcelona.

"We're going to do everything we can to nullify the Real Barcelona contract," said Timberwolves President David Kahn. "Hopefully Ricky will see how much he means to us when we move our entire organization to Madrid or Barcelona or some other Spanish town. I've never been there, so those are the only two I know."

One of Rubio's potential teammates, Al Jefferson, is not very happy about the move.

"Why are we moving to Spain? Why don't we just move to California, or Florida, or Ohio or some other state one of our players is from. This is ridiculous!"

We could not reach Kevin Love for comment, but I'm sure he'll be all over it on Twitter.

Timberwolves Coaching Search Over; Feel They Can Still Suck Without One

Minnesota Timberwolves
Originally uploaded by twodolla

The Minnesota Timberwolves have been looking for a head coach since the firing of Kevin McHale. Potential candidates included current ESPN analyst Mark Jackson, Lakers assistant Kurt Rambis, and Rockets assistant Elston Turner. Some reports say that the search has been put on hold with Timberwolves president David Kahn traveling to Spain, working on Ricky Rubio's buyout. Well, the search has been put on hold permanently. The T-wolves will play without a coach.

"It is an unorthodox move," says Kahn, "but we feel that it is in the best interests of our team right now. Not sure if you noticed this or not, be we don't really look like we know what the hell is going on here anyway. What was our record last year with a coach....24-58? We should be able to win 24 games without one. Plus we need to save some cash with Rubio's buyout. Hell, we're even asking players to Twitter more to get more ticket sales."